Citburban

I grew up on the East Coast. I am used to traffic, and I have parallel parked a Crown Victoria in downtown Boston. But I am also used to real city, the kind that has subways and metros and allows you to live car free, if you so desire. LA is not that city. In fact, I am even wondering if LA is a city at all. These days, it seems to me to be more like a whole herd of little citylettes all shoved together in the same suburban area. But even more shocking than the lack of city-like amenities in this city is the complete lack of suburban-like amenities. The really baffling thing is laundry detergent. Where in a non-city, non-suburban world does one buy laundry detergent if they do not want to pay grocery store prices?

I know many of you out there are thinking, “duh Walmart,” but that in and of itself is an interesting situation. For some reason in this craziness of life that I like to call citburban, there is apparently one Walmart for every 2 million people. Kind of makes you think of Jan and Dean. At least their girl to boy ratio was a little more favorable.
From where I am living in Burbank, the closest Walmart is 10.6 miles away (a distance that google estimates to be up to 25 minutes away in traffic), and the shopping experience promises to be delightful with reviews like “i live here in panorama dis place is ghetto the way i grew up” and “It is located in Panorama City which is not the safest location at the corner of Roscoe and Van Nuys Blvd (gangs).”

So enter the in-mall Target. In downtown Glendale, in the Glendale Galleria is a three-story target with all the laundry detergent that your heart could desire. With the nifty little cart escalators (escalators made just for your cart), the shopping experience is great. And the funny part is, that to get back to your free mall parking in the four-story parking deck, you tote your Target bags, the pack of paper towels and the ironing board you just purchased back through the mall past Forever 21 and the Apple Store. Citburban indeed, but a girl’s gotta look good in all this traffic.